1 00:00:00,033 --> 00:00:04,056 Synced and corrected by -robtor- www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:04,080 --> 00:00:05,924 [SIGHS] 3 00:00:05,948 --> 00:00:08,494 [SNIFFS] By the way, you were wrong. 4 00:00:08,518 --> 00:00:11,063 Yeah? Look around. I know. 5 00:00:11,087 --> 00:00:13,465 When I was putting on my work shirt this morning, two things dawned on me. 6 00:00:13,489 --> 00:00:15,467 One, this shade of blue really makes my eyes pop, 7 00:00:15,491 --> 00:00:17,936 and, two, this shirt does not require a tie. 8 00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:20,720 I don't know why I would want to extend this conversation, 9 00:00:20,744 --> 00:00:22,704 but... how's that make me wrong? 10 00:00:22,705 --> 00:00:23,882 'Cause you're always up in my grille. 11 00:00:23,906 --> 00:00:25,450 "You gotta learn how to tie a tie, Axl. 12 00:00:25,474 --> 00:00:26,785 You gonna need it for your job." 13 00:00:26,809 --> 00:00:28,887 Well, I've got a job, 14 00:00:28,911 --> 00:00:30,855 and the only person in my entire company 15 00:00:30,879 --> 00:00:31,990 who wears a tie 16 00:00:32,014 --> 00:00:33,391 is the talking toilet logo. 17 00:00:33,415 --> 00:00:36,728 Look, every man should know how to do seven things, 18 00:00:36,752 --> 00:00:38,229 and tying a tie is one of 'em. 19 00:00:38,253 --> 00:00:39,631 Huh. 20 00:00:39,655 --> 00:00:42,734 I don't know why I'd want to extend this conversation, 21 00:00:42,758 --> 00:00:43,768 so I won't. 22 00:00:43,792 --> 00:00:45,337 The other six are... 23 00:00:45,361 --> 00:00:47,361 whistle with your fingers, read a map, 24 00:00:47,496 --> 00:00:49,507 grill with charcoal, shine your shoes, 25 00:00:49,531 --> 00:00:51,343 open a bottle without an opener, 26 00:00:51,367 --> 00:00:52,777 and breaking down a door. 27 00:00:52,801 --> 00:00:53,778 Wow. 28 00:00:53,802 --> 00:00:55,113 That's all pretty relevant stuff. 29 00:00:55,137 --> 00:00:57,849 Got any more gems like that, just shoot me a fax. 30 00:00:57,873 --> 00:00:59,351 Why is that funny? 31 00:00:59,375 --> 00:01:01,353 - 'Cause it's old. [CHUCKLES] - Ah. 32 00:01:01,377 --> 00:01:02,721 How am I supposed to learn how to drive 33 00:01:02,745 --> 00:01:04,055 if you won't let me practice? 34 00:01:04,079 --> 00:01:07,000 I'm sorry, Brick, but there were eggs in the car... and me. 35 00:01:07,024 --> 00:01:09,127 Dad, will you please talk some sense into your wife? 36 00:01:09,151 --> 00:01:10,762 My learner's permit expires in a week, 37 00:01:10,786 --> 00:01:12,163 and if I don't get my license, 38 00:01:12,187 --> 00:01:14,799 you're gonna have to pay $9 of your hard-earned money 39 00:01:14,823 --> 00:01:15,800 for me to renew it. 40 00:01:15,824 --> 00:01:18,470 A small price to pay to live. 41 00:01:18,494 --> 00:01:20,905 Look, Brick, we gave you plenty of chances, 42 00:01:20,929 --> 00:01:22,774 but both your dad and I don't feel comfortable 43 00:01:22,798 --> 00:01:24,009 letting you back on the road. 44 00:01:24,033 --> 00:01:25,143 So, in other words, 45 00:01:25,167 --> 00:01:26,811 you two think I'm such a terrible driver 46 00:01:26,835 --> 00:01:28,413 that if I even step foot in that car, 47 00:01:28,437 --> 00:01:31,049 I'll hurt myself, you guys, and other innocent people? 48 00:01:31,073 --> 00:01:33,551 Actually, those are the perfect words. 49 00:01:33,575 --> 00:01:35,720 Good listening, buddy. 50 00:01:35,744 --> 00:01:37,255 [SIGHS] 51 00:01:37,279 --> 00:01:39,424 [ UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS OVER HEADPHONES] 52 00:01:39,448 --> 00:01:42,060 ? 53 00:01:42,084 --> 00:01:43,361 Aah! 54 00:01:43,385 --> 00:01:45,330 [CHUCKLES] 55 00:01:45,354 --> 00:01:46,998 - Hi, Shelly. - Sorry. 56 00:01:47,022 --> 00:01:48,933 I rang the doorbell, but nobody answered. 57 00:01:48,957 --> 00:01:51,136 That's okay. I am always happy to see a Donahue... 58 00:01:51,160 --> 00:01:54,072 I mean all Donahues in general, not a specific Donahue. 59 00:01:54,096 --> 00:01:56,207 I love all Donahues equally, 60 00:01:56,231 --> 00:01:58,510 and so on and so forth and what have you. 61 00:01:58,534 --> 00:02:00,879 Um, I won this at your Yankee Swap party, 62 00:02:00,903 --> 00:02:03,314 and I was wondering if you had the box it came in. 63 00:02:03,338 --> 00:02:05,817 I'm gonna give it to my pen pal, Juliette, in England. 64 00:02:05,841 --> 00:02:07,252 What? No! 65 00:02:07,276 --> 00:02:09,687 No, you can't send that to England. 66 00:02:09,711 --> 00:02:10,955 I don't know how to say this, 67 00:02:10,979 --> 00:02:13,625 but that snow globe is really important to me, 68 00:02:13,649 --> 00:02:15,293 so if you're not gonna keep it, 69 00:02:15,317 --> 00:02:17,662 I would appreciate it if you could give it back to me. 70 00:02:17,686 --> 00:02:20,031 - Of course, I'll give it back to you... - Aww. 71 00:02:20,055 --> 00:02:22,767 ...for an item of equal or greater value. 72 00:02:22,791 --> 00:02:25,703 Okay, I'm willing to make that trade, 73 00:02:25,727 --> 00:02:29,774 but I must warn you, I am a very tough negotiator. 74 00:02:29,798 --> 00:02:31,609 [ ANNOUNCER SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY ON TV] 75 00:02:31,633 --> 00:02:33,978 [ WHISTLE BLOWS] 76 00:02:34,002 --> 00:02:35,780 [DOOR OPENS] 77 00:02:35,804 --> 00:02:38,183 ? 78 00:02:38,207 --> 00:02:41,052 [DOOR CLOSES] 79 00:02:41,076 --> 00:02:42,220 [ LOUD WHISTLE] 80 00:02:42,244 --> 00:02:44,089 Oh, I'm sorry. Did I startle you? 81 00:02:44,113 --> 00:02:46,791 Or should I say, did my phone startle you? 82 00:02:46,815 --> 00:02:47,892 I found a whistle app. 83 00:02:47,916 --> 00:02:49,461 It's got Falling Off A Cliff... 84 00:02:49,485 --> 00:02:51,463 [ WHISTLE!] 85 00:02:51,487 --> 00:02:53,565 ...the now-inappropriate construction-worker catcall... 86 00:02:53,589 --> 00:02:55,166 [ WOLF-WHISTLES] 87 00:02:55,190 --> 00:02:56,668 ...and several fart noises. 88 00:02:56,692 --> 00:02:58,136 [ FARTING SOUNDS] 89 00:02:58,160 --> 00:03:00,371 [FARTS] Sorry. That last one was real. 90 00:03:00,395 --> 00:03:03,842 The point is, I no longer need your little list. 91 00:03:03,866 --> 00:03:07,045 ? 92 00:03:07,069 --> 00:03:09,481 Hey, Mom. Can I pick your brain? 93 00:03:09,505 --> 00:03:11,416 Sure, but I don't know why you'd want to. 94 00:03:11,440 --> 00:03:12,784 I just came in here from the kitchen, 95 00:03:12,808 --> 00:03:14,953 and I literally have no idea why. 96 00:03:14,977 --> 00:03:17,889 Well, I was thinking of giving this snow globe to Sean. 97 00:03:17,913 --> 00:03:19,057 You know, I thought it'd be cool 98 00:03:19,081 --> 00:03:21,392 because he always calls me his special snowflake, 99 00:03:21,416 --> 00:03:23,995 and, also [SIGHS] 100 00:03:24,019 --> 00:03:27,065 I was thinking of telling him how I feel. 101 00:03:27,089 --> 00:03:28,967 - Really? - Yeah. 102 00:03:28,991 --> 00:03:30,268 Ever since we kissed, 103 00:03:30,292 --> 00:03:32,971 I've been trying to find the perfect moment, 104 00:03:32,995 --> 00:03:36,174 but I feel like I just need to lay it all on the line, 105 00:03:36,198 --> 00:03:37,942 and then whatever happens, happens. 106 00:03:37,966 --> 00:03:39,210 I totally agree. 107 00:03:39,234 --> 00:03:40,645 You know, everyone assumes that the guy 108 00:03:40,669 --> 00:03:42,180 should be the first one to say how he feels, 109 00:03:42,204 --> 00:03:44,215 but the truth is, some guys need a little push. 110 00:03:44,239 --> 00:03:46,184 Is that how it was with you and Dad? 111 00:03:46,208 --> 00:03:48,586 Well... not exactly. 112 00:03:48,610 --> 00:03:51,022 Oh, so he didn't tell you he loved you first? 113 00:03:51,046 --> 00:03:52,457 I'm not sure he's ever told me that, 114 00:03:52,481 --> 00:03:54,826 but he definitely implied it at our wedding. 115 00:03:54,850 --> 00:03:55,927 Oh. 116 00:03:55,951 --> 00:03:57,428 ? 117 00:03:57,452 --> 00:03:59,030 What do all these shoes have in common? 118 00:03:59,054 --> 00:04:00,632 They stink? 119 00:04:00,656 --> 00:04:02,667 Wrong. [SNIFFS] Well, maybe. 120 00:04:02,691 --> 00:04:04,569 The correct answer is, none of them have to be shined. 121 00:04:04,593 --> 00:04:05,537 Mic drop. 122 00:04:05,561 --> 00:04:07,794 Ooh. Shoe drop. 123 00:04:08,864 --> 00:04:10,842 Well, I am headed back to school. 124 00:04:10,866 --> 00:04:12,777 Who knows? Next time you see me 125 00:04:12,801 --> 00:04:14,579 [SINGSONG VOICE] I might have some news. 126 00:04:14,603 --> 00:04:16,014 Get these shoes off my table, 127 00:04:16,038 --> 00:04:17,415 or I'll make you drive with Brick. 128 00:04:17,439 --> 00:04:19,450 [DOOR OPENS, CLOSES] 129 00:04:19,474 --> 00:04:22,108 [PANTING] My car was stolen! 130 00:04:23,312 --> 00:04:25,223 It was right here last night. 131 00:04:25,247 --> 00:04:27,392 I loaded it up to go to school, and now it's gone. 132 00:04:27,416 --> 00:04:28,893 - It's gone! - Okay, calm down. 133 00:04:28,917 --> 00:04:30,495 Calm down? 134 00:04:30,519 --> 00:04:33,298 Thieves brazenly walked up the driveway, 135 00:04:33,322 --> 00:04:34,632 opened the car door, 136 00:04:34,656 --> 00:04:37,168 grabbed the keys from the dashboard, 137 00:04:37,192 --> 00:04:38,870 and stole my car! 138 00:04:38,894 --> 00:04:40,238 Oh, my God. I can't believe it. 139 00:04:40,262 --> 00:04:41,739 Sue, I am so sorry. 140 00:04:41,763 --> 00:04:42,807 Excuse me, but I believe 141 00:04:42,831 --> 00:04:44,008 I'm the real victim in this crime. 142 00:04:44,032 --> 00:04:45,977 I was next in line to get Aunt Edie's car. 143 00:04:46,001 --> 00:04:47,111 Actually, I am. 144 00:04:47,135 --> 00:04:49,380 What are you talking about? You already got a car. 145 00:04:49,404 --> 00:04:50,882 You wrecked it on spring break. 146 00:04:50,906 --> 00:04:53,151 True, but I'm the oldest, so I just get back in line. 147 00:04:53,175 --> 00:04:54,786 That's not how it works. 148 00:04:54,810 --> 00:04:56,721 Can we please stop fighting about who gets the car? 149 00:04:56,745 --> 00:04:58,223 It's my car, and it was stolen. 150 00:04:58,247 --> 00:04:59,424 Well, we gotta go to the police. 151 00:04:59,448 --> 00:05:00,825 I just want to remind you, 152 00:05:00,849 --> 00:05:02,794 the last time we reported a car stolen, 153 00:05:02,818 --> 00:05:04,095 it turned out you had just forgotten 154 00:05:04,119 --> 00:05:05,263 where you parked it. 155 00:05:05,287 --> 00:05:06,998 So before we get the police involved, 156 00:05:07,022 --> 00:05:09,334 I think Sue should think about what she did yesterday 157 00:05:09,358 --> 00:05:11,903 and make sure you didn't leave it somewhere other than our driveway. 158 00:05:11,927 --> 00:05:13,238 I'll think about it, 159 00:05:13,262 --> 00:05:16,307 but I am positive it was in the driveway last night. 160 00:05:16,331 --> 00:05:17,308 Great. 161 00:05:17,332 --> 00:05:18,309 If we don't get this car back, 162 00:05:18,333 --> 00:05:19,677 I'm never gonna be able to drive. 163 00:05:19,701 --> 00:05:21,946 [SIGHS] Don't try to put a positive spin on it, Brick. 164 00:05:21,970 --> 00:05:23,081 It's just bad. 165 00:05:23,105 --> 00:05:25,216 [SIGHS] 166 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:27,852 FRANKIE: I couldn't believe in Orson, Indiana, 167 00:05:27,876 --> 00:05:29,687 something like this would happen. 168 00:05:29,711 --> 00:05:30,922 - Who would do such a... - [TIRES SCREECH] 169 00:05:30,946 --> 00:05:34,192 [CRASH] 170 00:05:34,216 --> 00:05:35,593 Hey! 171 00:05:35,617 --> 00:05:36,694 Hey! 172 00:05:36,718 --> 00:05:40,064 Hey, that's my daughter's car! 173 00:05:40,088 --> 00:05:42,834 If it's your daughter's car, how come I'm drivin' it? 174 00:05:42,858 --> 00:05:44,802 Uh, maybe 'cause you're a thief. 175 00:05:44,826 --> 00:05:46,471 It's mine. 176 00:05:46,495 --> 00:05:48,840 My boys gave me this car as a gift 177 00:05:48,864 --> 00:05:50,241 for bein' a good mama. 178 00:05:50,265 --> 00:05:51,676 If it's your car, why do you have 179 00:05:51,700 --> 00:05:53,711 an "I Heart Dolphins" key chain? 180 00:05:53,735 --> 00:05:55,613 'Cause I do heart dolphins. 181 00:05:55,637 --> 00:05:56,881 They're the clowns of the sea. 182 00:05:56,905 --> 00:05:58,283 - [SCOFFS] - Ooh. 183 00:05:58,307 --> 00:06:00,685 I know what you're tryin' to do. 184 00:06:00,709 --> 00:06:04,122 You're tryin' to provoke me into a physical "alterfication." 185 00:06:04,146 --> 00:06:06,557 Well, I'm better than that. 186 00:06:06,581 --> 00:06:08,259 And I got two strikes. 187 00:06:08,283 --> 00:06:10,228 [SIGHS] Look, Rita, I am not making this up. 188 00:06:10,252 --> 00:06:12,430 My Aunt Edie gave that car to my daughter. 189 00:06:12,454 --> 00:06:15,566 Well, then, your Aunt Edie can come get it back. 190 00:06:15,590 --> 00:06:17,201 [SIGHS] She passed away. 191 00:06:17,225 --> 00:06:19,771 Oh, ain't that convenient? 192 00:06:19,795 --> 00:06:22,840 The only person who can "corraborate" your story 193 00:06:22,864 --> 00:06:24,175 is dead? 194 00:06:24,199 --> 00:06:25,243 - Ha! - [SCOFFS] 195 00:06:25,267 --> 00:06:27,078 Come on, Rita. Do the right thing. 196 00:06:27,102 --> 00:06:29,213 Hate speech! Hate speech! 197 00:06:29,237 --> 00:06:31,349 She's hates me because I'm white! 198 00:06:31,373 --> 00:06:33,184 I'm white! 199 00:06:33,208 --> 00:06:35,653 ? 200 00:06:35,677 --> 00:06:37,955 [ENGINE STARTS] [BAGS THUD] 201 00:06:37,979 --> 00:06:39,924 You are not leaving in my car. 202 00:06:39,948 --> 00:06:42,260 That's right. I'm leaving in mine. 203 00:06:42,284 --> 00:06:43,761 I was gonna go get Tang and cigarettes, 204 00:06:43,785 --> 00:06:45,852 but I guess my kids will just go hungry. 205 00:06:47,289 --> 00:06:48,399 Aah! 206 00:06:48,423 --> 00:06:49,667 [TIRES SQUEAL] 207 00:06:49,691 --> 00:06:52,270 ? 208 00:06:52,294 --> 00:06:53,538 [SIGHS DEEPLY] 209 00:06:53,562 --> 00:06:55,273 [BAGS RUSTLING] 210 00:06:55,297 --> 00:06:56,207 Glossners! 211 00:06:56,231 --> 00:06:57,308 - Glossners. - What? 212 00:06:57,332 --> 00:06:58,643 The Glossners stole our car. 213 00:06:58,667 --> 00:07:00,211 I said, "Rita, that's our car." 214 00:07:00,235 --> 00:07:01,646 And she was all, "You're just tryin' 215 00:07:01,670 --> 00:07:03,281 to provoke me into an alterfication." 216 00:07:03,305 --> 00:07:04,782 The Glossners stole our car? 217 00:07:04,806 --> 00:07:06,084 Yeah, can you believe it? 218 00:07:06,108 --> 00:07:07,719 Guess it's gone forever. 219 00:07:07,743 --> 00:07:09,454 [SCOFFS] What do you mean, "It's gone forever"? 220 00:07:09,478 --> 00:07:11,689 We're not talking about a rake or a garden hose here, Frankie. 221 00:07:11,713 --> 00:07:13,024 We're talking about an automobile. 222 00:07:13,048 --> 00:07:14,859 That's a felony, and we're going to the police. 223 00:07:14,883 --> 00:07:16,060 Come on, Mike. 224 00:07:16,084 --> 00:07:18,296 You know what happens when you snitch on the Glossners. 225 00:07:18,320 --> 00:07:20,164 They get you back a thousand times over. 226 00:07:20,188 --> 00:07:21,399 We're not going to the police. 227 00:07:21,423 --> 00:07:22,567 Going to the police for what? 228 00:07:22,591 --> 00:07:23,835 Glossners stole our car. 229 00:07:23,859 --> 00:07:25,103 What?! Ugh! 230 00:07:25,127 --> 00:07:27,171 Aw, well, I guess it's gone forever. 231 00:07:27,195 --> 00:07:28,940 What is the matter with you two? 232 00:07:28,964 --> 00:07:30,308 Mike, this is the Glossners. 233 00:07:30,332 --> 00:07:32,043 We can't poke the bear on this one. 234 00:07:32,067 --> 00:07:34,479 The hell we can't. The bear stole our car! 235 00:07:34,503 --> 00:07:37,348 ? 236 00:07:37,372 --> 00:07:39,817 So, did the car have any distinguishing features? 237 00:07:39,841 --> 00:07:41,686 Well, there was a crack on the windshield, 238 00:07:41,710 --> 00:07:42,854 and there was a dream catcher 239 00:07:42,878 --> 00:07:44,389 hanging from the rearview mirror. 240 00:07:44,413 --> 00:07:45,356 Oh, do those work? 241 00:07:45,380 --> 00:07:46,557 Not in this family. 242 00:07:46,581 --> 00:07:48,659 The dreams come up, then go right around it. 243 00:07:48,683 --> 00:07:51,329 Anything valuable inside the vehicle? 244 00:07:51,353 --> 00:07:53,264 Well, I was getting ready to drive back to school, 245 00:07:53,288 --> 00:07:54,432 so there was my duffel, 246 00:07:54,456 --> 00:07:56,100 a Little Betty cupcake in the middle console 247 00:07:56,124 --> 00:07:58,269 for the 42-minute drive, and... 248 00:07:58,293 --> 00:08:01,639 [GASPS] Oh, my God. My snow globe was in there. 249 00:08:01,663 --> 00:08:04,108 That means the Glossners have my snow globe, too. 250 00:08:04,132 --> 00:08:05,799 The Glossners? 251 00:08:07,536 --> 00:08:08,946 Well, sorry, folks. 252 00:08:08,970 --> 00:08:10,848 I guess the car is gone forever. 253 00:08:10,872 --> 00:08:12,583 Why does everyone keep saying that? 254 00:08:12,607 --> 00:08:14,385 I don't like to deal with the Glossners. 255 00:08:14,409 --> 00:08:15,553 They're criminals. 256 00:08:15,577 --> 00:08:17,422 You're supposed to deal with criminals. 257 00:08:17,446 --> 00:08:19,157 That's your exact job description. 258 00:08:19,181 --> 00:08:20,925 Now it's the next guy's job description. 259 00:08:20,949 --> 00:08:22,660 I'm retiring in four days. 260 00:08:22,684 --> 00:08:26,397 Look, my backyard butts right up against the Glossners, 261 00:08:26,421 --> 00:08:28,733 and I just resodded my lawn. 262 00:08:28,757 --> 00:08:30,902 What is happening here? 263 00:08:30,926 --> 00:08:32,970 Am I supposed to just forget about my car? 264 00:08:32,994 --> 00:08:35,373 Ah, the Glossners get tired of stuff. 265 00:08:35,397 --> 00:08:36,808 You'll probably find your car 266 00:08:36,832 --> 00:08:38,810 on the side of the road in a couple of months. 267 00:08:38,834 --> 00:08:40,311 Trust me, you don't wanna 268 00:08:40,335 --> 00:08:42,180 poke the bees' nest on this one. 269 00:08:42,204 --> 00:08:43,347 That's exactly what I said, 270 00:08:43,371 --> 00:08:45,183 but I used "bear" instead of "bees." 271 00:08:45,207 --> 00:08:46,651 They're not bees, and they're not bears. 272 00:08:46,675 --> 00:08:48,886 They're felons, and they stole my damn car. 273 00:08:48,910 --> 00:08:50,621 Huh. 274 00:08:50,645 --> 00:08:52,089 ? 275 00:08:52,113 --> 00:08:54,892 I can't believe the cops aren't gonna do anything! 276 00:08:54,916 --> 00:08:56,394 One time, I accidentally 277 00:08:56,418 --> 00:08:58,563 walked out of the Orson Bowl in bowling shoes. 278 00:08:58,587 --> 00:09:00,064 They sent both squad cars. 279 00:09:00,088 --> 00:09:01,799 Well, the Glossners are above the law. 280 00:09:01,823 --> 00:09:03,267 I mean, think of all the things 281 00:09:03,291 --> 00:09:04,635 they've done to us over the years. 282 00:09:04,659 --> 00:09:05,970 They blew up our mailbox. 283 00:09:05,994 --> 00:09:07,171 They peanut-buttered our mailbox. 284 00:09:07,195 --> 00:09:08,706 They dog-doo'd our mailbox. 285 00:09:08,730 --> 00:09:11,108 - What is their deal with our mailbox? - Ugh. 286 00:09:11,132 --> 00:09:12,743 When I had my fifth-grade camping party, 287 00:09:12,767 --> 00:09:14,045 they skunked our tent. 288 00:09:14,069 --> 00:09:16,514 What kind of people just have a skunk lying around, 289 00:09:16,538 --> 00:09:19,016 waiting to terrorize little girls? 290 00:09:19,040 --> 00:09:21,185 The same people who drew boobs on our garage. 291 00:09:21,209 --> 00:09:23,154 How about the time they wrote "nerd" on the side of the house 292 00:09:23,178 --> 00:09:25,056 with an arrow pointing to my bedroom? 293 00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:26,324 Actually, that was me. 294 00:09:26,348 --> 00:09:27,258 [SIGHS] 295 00:09:27,282 --> 00:09:28,726 You know, as long as the Glossners 296 00:09:28,750 --> 00:09:30,695 live in that house, this is gonna be our lives. 297 00:09:30,719 --> 00:09:31,929 This is how it's gonna be forever. 298 00:09:31,953 --> 00:09:33,297 [SIGHS] 299 00:09:33,321 --> 00:09:34,832 It doesn't have to be. 300 00:09:34,856 --> 00:09:36,968 Dad, we went to the Orson Police. 301 00:09:36,992 --> 00:09:38,936 You can't go any higher than that. 302 00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:42,607 ? 303 00:09:42,631 --> 00:09:44,342 I'm goin' over to the Glossners. 304 00:09:44,366 --> 00:09:46,010 You're gonna take our car back? 305 00:09:46,034 --> 00:09:47,645 I'm gonna do more than that. 306 00:09:47,669 --> 00:09:49,680 I'm gonna take our neighborhood back. 307 00:09:49,704 --> 00:09:51,282 Who's with me? 308 00:09:51,306 --> 00:09:53,351 I'm in. 309 00:09:53,375 --> 00:09:54,785 I'm in. 310 00:09:54,809 --> 00:09:56,053 I'm in. 311 00:09:56,077 --> 00:09:58,256 ? 312 00:09:58,280 --> 00:09:59,557 I know, from a dramatic standpoint, 313 00:09:59,581 --> 00:10:00,791 I'm supposed to say "I'm in," 314 00:10:00,815 --> 00:10:02,282 but I'm not really sure what I can contribute. 315 00:10:04,686 --> 00:10:06,330 Fine. I'm in. 316 00:10:06,354 --> 00:10:08,332 [CHUCKLES] [SIGHS] 317 00:10:08,356 --> 00:10:13,738 ? 318 00:10:13,762 --> 00:10:15,862 Let's do this. 319 00:10:18,409 --> 00:10:20,595 - [BANGS ON DOOR] - Rita! 320 00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:22,065 We're here to take our car back! 321 00:10:22,089 --> 00:10:24,334 You can make this easy, or you can make it hard! 322 00:10:24,358 --> 00:10:26,169 RITA: You know what to do boys! 323 00:10:26,193 --> 00:10:28,805 [INDISTINCT SHOUTING] 324 00:10:28,829 --> 00:10:32,308 ? 325 00:10:32,332 --> 00:10:34,610 [SHOUTING CONTINUES] 326 00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:36,879 It's an ambush! 327 00:10:36,903 --> 00:10:40,271 ? 328 00:10:40,407 --> 00:10:41,584 Oh, my God! What the... 329 00:10:41,608 --> 00:10:43,386 Retreat! Retreat! 330 00:10:43,410 --> 00:10:44,387 Aah! 331 00:10:44,411 --> 00:10:45,788 Diaper. 332 00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:46,823 [SQUEALS] 333 00:10:46,847 --> 00:10:47,490 [MUNCHING] 334 00:10:47,514 --> 00:10:48,725 Ow! Hey! 335 00:10:48,749 --> 00:10:51,427 Frankie, I need one of your emergency cookies. 336 00:10:51,451 --> 00:10:52,662 I don't have any! 337 00:10:52,686 --> 00:10:53,629 I know you do! 338 00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:58,401 ? 339 00:10:58,425 --> 00:11:00,069 Hey, little kid, looky. 340 00:11:00,093 --> 00:11:02,271 Cookie. Here you go! 341 00:11:02,295 --> 00:11:04,173 Yum, yum, yum. 342 00:11:04,197 --> 00:11:06,275 [SHOUTING CONTINUES] 343 00:11:06,299 --> 00:11:08,344 [ALL BREATHING HEAVILY] 344 00:11:08,368 --> 00:11:10,713 What the hell happened? 345 00:11:10,737 --> 00:11:12,648 I'll tell you what happened... we got our butts kicked. 346 00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:14,050 That's what happened. 347 00:11:14,074 --> 00:11:16,619 MIKE: Hey. Where have you been? 348 00:11:16,643 --> 00:11:18,755 It occurred to me that in most action movies, 349 00:11:18,779 --> 00:11:20,556 there's a tech guy who hangs back 350 00:11:20,580 --> 00:11:21,824 and does his "tech thing." 351 00:11:21,848 --> 00:11:23,626 He's usually played by a young Jonah Hill-type. 352 00:11:23,650 --> 00:11:25,528 We almost got killed out there, Brick! 353 00:11:25,552 --> 00:11:27,430 They wrapped me up in a volleyball net. 354 00:11:27,454 --> 00:11:28,898 Hey, this is ours. 355 00:11:28,922 --> 00:11:30,033 Okay, look, it's clear 356 00:11:30,057 --> 00:11:31,701 the Glossners aren't gonna go down without a fight, 357 00:11:31,725 --> 00:11:34,003 so we gotta rethink our strategy and get that car back. 358 00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:35,471 Do we, though? 359 00:11:35,495 --> 00:11:37,173 I mean, we did get our volleyball net back. 360 00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:39,475 I'm with Axl. I say we call it a win and go home. 361 00:11:39,499 --> 00:11:40,543 No! 362 00:11:40,567 --> 00:11:41,878 We're always the people who give it our half. 363 00:11:41,902 --> 00:11:43,379 This time, we're gonna give it our all. 364 00:11:43,403 --> 00:11:46,649 Yeah, I'm with Dad. "Wonder Woman" just came out on Redbox, 365 00:11:46,673 --> 00:11:48,418 and if I took one thing away from that movie, 366 00:11:48,442 --> 00:11:50,186 it's that women can kick butt. 367 00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:51,753 How about you get through the door at Curves 368 00:11:51,778 --> 00:11:53,489 without being winded and then we'll talk? 369 00:11:53,513 --> 00:11:54,891 I say we call a family vote. 370 00:11:54,915 --> 00:11:56,526 All in favor of leaving with our health 371 00:11:56,550 --> 00:11:58,594 and what's left of our dignity say "aye." 372 00:11:58,618 --> 00:11:59,595 Aye. Aye. 373 00:11:59,619 --> 00:12:01,226 - BRICK: All opposed? - Nay. Nay. 374 00:12:01,250 --> 00:12:03,099 Ha! It's a tie. 375 00:12:03,123 --> 00:12:05,468 Wait. How can it be a tie? Did we not count Brick? 376 00:12:05,492 --> 00:12:07,303 I'm standing right here with my hand up. 377 00:12:07,327 --> 00:12:09,739 [GASPS] They have Sue. 378 00:12:09,763 --> 00:12:13,810 ? 379 00:12:13,834 --> 00:12:15,567 [MUFFLED SCREAM] 380 00:12:16,873 --> 00:12:18,092 We have to get Sue. 381 00:12:18,117 --> 00:12:19,461 I don't wanna seem insensitive, 382 00:12:19,485 --> 00:12:22,454 but I was under the impression we were here to get my car. 383 00:12:22,494 --> 00:12:23,574 My car. 384 00:12:23,598 --> 00:12:25,221 - You're not getting away with this. - I told you I'm the oldest! 385 00:12:25,246 --> 00:12:26,480 - It's my car and... - Come on! 386 00:12:26,504 --> 00:12:28,579 Hey, we're gonna get the car and Sue. 387 00:12:28,603 --> 00:12:30,248 Axl, you and I are gonna storm the house. 388 00:12:30,272 --> 00:12:31,449 Brick, you act as a lookout 389 00:12:31,473 --> 00:12:32,884 while your mom sneaks into the garage 390 00:12:32,908 --> 00:12:34,218 to see if the car is there. 391 00:12:34,242 --> 00:12:35,219 Okay. 392 00:12:35,243 --> 00:12:37,054 ? 393 00:12:37,078 --> 00:12:38,923 [ALL SIGH] 394 00:12:38,947 --> 00:12:41,325 They have us outnumbered. It's a suicide mission. 395 00:12:41,349 --> 00:12:43,628 [SIGHS] 396 00:12:43,652 --> 00:12:46,197 They used to have us outnumbered. 397 00:12:46,221 --> 00:12:53,571 ? 398 00:12:53,595 --> 00:13:01,045 ? 399 00:13:01,069 --> 00:13:03,014 We're here to kick some butt. 400 00:13:03,038 --> 00:13:04,482 And I made deviled eggs. 401 00:13:04,506 --> 00:13:06,551 Fighting Glossners makes me hungry. 402 00:13:06,575 --> 00:13:07,919 I tried to get Paula in on this, 403 00:13:07,943 --> 00:13:09,654 but she's on a date with some guy. 404 00:13:09,678 --> 00:13:11,489 [VOICE BREAKING] Talk about getting blindsided. 405 00:13:11,513 --> 00:13:12,757 Not the time, Bill. 406 00:13:12,781 --> 00:13:14,158 All right. Here we go. 407 00:13:14,182 --> 00:13:17,128 3, 2, 1. 408 00:13:17,152 --> 00:13:18,763 [ALL SHOUTING] 409 00:13:18,787 --> 00:13:25,937 ? 410 00:13:25,961 --> 00:13:28,339 [ALL SHOUTING] 411 00:13:28,363 --> 00:13:36,480 ? 412 00:13:36,504 --> 00:13:37,448 Aah-ha-ha! 413 00:13:37,472 --> 00:13:38,816 Aah! 414 00:13:38,840 --> 00:13:41,319 Hey, this is ours, too. Oh, God. Aah! 415 00:13:41,343 --> 00:13:43,821 I am taking you boys home, cooking you a good meal, 416 00:13:43,845 --> 00:13:46,090 making you watch "Little House on the Prairie," 417 00:13:46,114 --> 00:13:48,448 and getting you to bed at a decent hour! 418 00:13:49,818 --> 00:13:54,232 There's Glossners at 2:00, 6:00, 10:00. 419 00:13:54,256 --> 00:13:55,967 Glossners at all o'clocks! 420 00:13:55,991 --> 00:13:59,837 ? 421 00:13:59,861 --> 00:14:01,038 FRANKIE: Ow! Hey! 422 00:14:01,062 --> 00:14:03,140 That was my non-bruised leg! 423 00:14:03,164 --> 00:14:05,877 [GRUNTING] Now you've made me mad! 424 00:14:05,901 --> 00:14:09,235 Aaaaaaaah! 425 00:14:11,940 --> 00:14:14,118 [GROANS] 426 00:14:14,142 --> 00:14:15,319 Step aside. 427 00:14:15,343 --> 00:14:16,721 I got an app on my phone for that. 428 00:14:16,745 --> 00:14:17,722 Really? 429 00:14:17,746 --> 00:14:19,056 No. 430 00:14:19,080 --> 00:14:24,528 ? 431 00:14:24,552 --> 00:14:26,297 BILL: Mike! Help! 432 00:14:26,321 --> 00:14:28,599 Please don't hurt me. I'm a single dad. 433 00:14:28,623 --> 00:14:31,002 What are you lookin' at, ya woman? 434 00:14:31,026 --> 00:14:32,036 Hey. 435 00:14:32,060 --> 00:14:33,671 That's not cool, man. Aah! 436 00:14:33,695 --> 00:14:36,807 [SHOUTING CONTINUES] 437 00:14:36,831 --> 00:14:44,582 ? 438 00:14:44,606 --> 00:14:46,651 Ow! Stupid hip. 439 00:14:46,675 --> 00:14:52,690 ? 440 00:14:52,714 --> 00:14:58,829 ? 441 00:14:58,853 --> 00:15:00,520 [GASPS, SCREAMS] 442 00:15:03,992 --> 00:15:05,169 [WHISPERING] Rita, please... 443 00:15:05,193 --> 00:15:07,738 Don't you "Rita, please" me. 444 00:15:07,762 --> 00:15:09,240 How dare you come onto my property 445 00:15:09,264 --> 00:15:10,508 and threaten my family? 446 00:15:10,532 --> 00:15:12,610 I could disappear you right now. 447 00:15:12,634 --> 00:15:14,312 Remember, you have two strikes. 448 00:15:14,336 --> 00:15:15,980 No alterfications. [LAUGHS] 449 00:15:16,004 --> 00:15:17,648 - Are you makin' fun of me? - No. No, ma'am. 450 00:15:17,672 --> 00:15:18,816 I am not. I would never do that. 451 00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:19,951 - [GRUNTS] - [STRAINED] Okay, I... Look. 452 00:15:19,975 --> 00:15:22,119 I-I know you're mad, and I get it. 453 00:15:22,143 --> 00:15:23,287 But think about it, think about it. 454 00:15:23,311 --> 00:15:25,356 [COUGHS] We're both moms, right? 455 00:15:25,380 --> 00:15:28,492 W-We need a mom revolution and... and... and love. 456 00:15:28,516 --> 00:15:30,728 Love is the only way to start that. 457 00:15:30,752 --> 00:15:33,230 Love, sweet love. 458 00:15:33,254 --> 00:15:37,635 What the world needs now is love, sweet love. 459 00:15:37,659 --> 00:15:38,703 [SIGHS] 460 00:15:38,727 --> 00:15:40,237 Oh, thank God. 461 00:15:40,261 --> 00:15:41,505 Thank you so much, Rita. 462 00:15:41,529 --> 00:15:42,940 I knew that you'd see it. 463 00:15:42,964 --> 00:15:43,741 See this. 464 00:15:43,765 --> 00:15:46,110 Aah! [HORN BLARING] 465 00:15:46,134 --> 00:15:49,146 ? 466 00:15:49,170 --> 00:15:50,481 Aah! 467 00:15:50,505 --> 00:15:52,483 Aaah! 468 00:15:52,507 --> 00:15:57,788 ? 469 00:15:57,812 --> 00:16:01,258 We are not doing well at all. 470 00:16:01,282 --> 00:16:03,361 [INDISTINCT SHOUTING] 471 00:16:03,385 --> 00:16:05,029 ? 472 00:16:05,053 --> 00:16:07,565 That's Cindy's backup safari hat! 473 00:16:07,589 --> 00:16:09,600 Those monsters! 474 00:16:09,624 --> 00:16:14,372 ? 475 00:16:14,396 --> 00:16:16,974 Axl?! Oh, thank God. 476 00:16:16,998 --> 00:16:18,909 But the door was locked from both sides. 477 00:16:18,933 --> 00:16:21,345 I know. I had to kick it in. 478 00:16:21,369 --> 00:16:23,547 [GASPS] Wait. 479 00:16:23,571 --> 00:16:26,050 I think the keys to my car are in Rita's purse. 480 00:16:26,074 --> 00:16:29,887 ? 481 00:16:29,911 --> 00:16:31,789 Ah, yes! 482 00:16:31,813 --> 00:16:38,029 ? 483 00:16:38,053 --> 00:16:39,430 [GASPS] 484 00:16:39,454 --> 00:16:41,220 ? 485 00:16:43,907 --> 00:16:45,685 [INDISTINCT SHOUTING] 486 00:16:45,709 --> 00:16:46,586 AXL: Dad! 487 00:16:46,610 --> 00:16:48,554 [SHOUTING CONTINUES] 488 00:16:48,578 --> 00:16:50,490 [BLOWS] 489 00:16:50,514 --> 00:16:52,358 [WHISTLES] 490 00:16:52,382 --> 00:16:59,232 ? 491 00:16:59,256 --> 00:17:01,034 [MIKE WHISTLES] 492 00:17:01,058 --> 00:17:03,970 ? 493 00:17:03,994 --> 00:17:06,039 Hey! I caught 'em! 494 00:17:06,063 --> 00:17:07,273 Get the car! 495 00:17:07,297 --> 00:17:08,241 Really? 496 00:17:08,265 --> 00:17:10,009 You guys want me to drive? 497 00:17:10,033 --> 00:17:11,177 You guys trust me?! 498 00:17:11,201 --> 00:17:12,011 Go! 499 00:17:12,035 --> 00:17:13,680 I won't let you down! 500 00:17:13,707 --> 00:17:15,718 And I just wanna say that it really means a lot! 501 00:17:15,742 --> 00:17:17,486 Just go! 502 00:17:17,510 --> 00:17:23,793 ? 503 00:17:23,817 --> 00:17:25,962 [ENGINE STARTS] 504 00:17:25,986 --> 00:17:27,496 [ENGINE REVVING] 505 00:17:27,520 --> 00:17:29,365 [DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS] 506 00:17:29,389 --> 00:17:30,555 [ENGINE REVS] 507 00:17:32,025 --> 00:17:34,870 [MUZAK PLAYS] 508 00:17:34,894 --> 00:17:39,875 ? 509 00:17:39,899 --> 00:17:41,844 Drive! 510 00:17:41,868 --> 00:17:43,412 ? 511 00:17:43,436 --> 00:17:45,514 Go faster! 512 00:17:45,538 --> 00:17:48,884 I'm gonna prove to you I could be a cautious driver! 513 00:17:48,908 --> 00:17:50,453 Look, not now, Brick! 514 00:17:50,477 --> 00:17:52,555 Now we want you to drive fast! 515 00:17:52,579 --> 00:17:54,256 I won't! 516 00:17:54,280 --> 00:17:58,494 ? 517 00:17:58,518 --> 00:18:00,429 Where ya goin' with my snow globe? 518 00:18:00,453 --> 00:18:04,000 Actually, I'm pretty sure it's my snow globe. 519 00:18:04,024 --> 00:18:06,402 You remember the promise I made to you? 520 00:18:06,426 --> 00:18:10,139 Mm, I hope it was to give me my snow globe and car back 521 00:18:10,163 --> 00:18:12,041 and let me go home. [LAUGHS NERVOUSLY] 522 00:18:12,065 --> 00:18:13,509 I promised to better myself for you, 523 00:18:13,533 --> 00:18:15,511 so I got a job at a tattoo parlor. 524 00:18:15,535 --> 00:18:17,446 My first paycheck was 50 bucks. 525 00:18:17,470 --> 00:18:20,416 After beer and cigarettes, I got 18 bucks left over. 526 00:18:20,440 --> 00:18:22,652 I figure that's enough for us to start a life together. 527 00:18:22,676 --> 00:18:26,922 Oh, that is... very flattering, 528 00:18:26,946 --> 00:18:29,125 but I-I kind of like someone else now. 529 00:18:29,149 --> 00:18:30,793 That's actually why I need the snow globe, 530 00:18:30,817 --> 00:18:32,662 to give it to the guy I like. 531 00:18:32,686 --> 00:18:33,663 You cheatin' on me? 532 00:18:33,687 --> 00:18:35,464 No! No, no, please! Derrick... 533 00:18:35,488 --> 00:18:36,866 Derrick, don't you see? 534 00:18:36,890 --> 00:18:38,934 You did better yourself, but you didn't do it for me. 535 00:18:38,958 --> 00:18:40,336 You did it for you. 536 00:18:40,360 --> 00:18:42,638 Now it's time to prove that you're a better man 537 00:18:42,662 --> 00:18:45,207 by giving me that snow globe and letting me go. 538 00:18:45,231 --> 00:18:46,308 Yeah. 539 00:18:46,332 --> 00:18:47,777 You're right. 540 00:18:47,801 --> 00:18:49,645 - This should go to the man you love. - [SIGHS] 541 00:18:49,669 --> 00:18:51,080 - Over my dead body. - Aah! 542 00:18:51,104 --> 00:18:52,415 No. No, no, no. 543 00:18:52,439 --> 00:18:53,482 No! 544 00:18:53,506 --> 00:18:56,218 ? 545 00:18:56,242 --> 00:18:57,520 [SOUR NOTES PLAYS] 546 00:18:57,544 --> 00:19:02,591 ? 547 00:19:02,615 --> 00:19:05,494 - [BREATHING HEAVILY] - [SIRENS WAILING] 548 00:19:05,518 --> 00:19:07,363 [TIRES SCREECHING] 549 00:19:07,387 --> 00:19:12,201 ? 550 00:19:12,225 --> 00:19:14,837 [POLICE RADIO CHATTER] 551 00:19:14,861 --> 00:19:21,277 ? 552 00:19:21,301 --> 00:19:24,046 Thank you for taking down those terrible Glossners. 553 00:19:24,070 --> 00:19:25,715 You're very brave. 554 00:19:25,739 --> 00:19:27,116 Really? 555 00:19:27,140 --> 00:19:28,484 Thank you. [CHUCKLES] 556 00:19:28,508 --> 00:19:29,919 I feel a lot safer... 557 00:19:29,943 --> 00:19:31,787 especially being a single woman 558 00:19:31,811 --> 00:19:33,656 who just moved into the neighborhood. 559 00:19:33,680 --> 00:19:34,957 ? 560 00:19:34,981 --> 00:19:37,093 [CLEARS THROAT] 561 00:19:37,117 --> 00:19:38,461 I'm Bill. 562 00:19:38,485 --> 00:19:40,084 Hi. Hi. 563 00:19:41,521 --> 00:19:43,199 Nice job, Dad. 564 00:19:43,223 --> 00:19:45,634 Pretty badass for an old guy. 565 00:19:45,658 --> 00:19:47,970 Any time you want me to write down that list for you, 566 00:19:47,994 --> 00:19:48,904 just let me know. 567 00:19:48,928 --> 00:19:50,139 I think I'm all right. 568 00:19:50,163 --> 00:19:54,009 ? 569 00:19:54,033 --> 00:19:57,279 Okay, that I got to learn. 570 00:19:57,303 --> 00:19:59,615 ? 571 00:19:59,639 --> 00:20:01,450 Got my snow globe back. 572 00:20:01,474 --> 00:20:05,020 You got your neighborhood back. 573 00:20:05,044 --> 00:20:06,655 Hey, thank you, Sheriff Dugan. 574 00:20:06,679 --> 00:20:09,125 Eh, I didn't need a good lawn anyway. 575 00:20:09,149 --> 00:20:14,063 ? 576 00:20:14,087 --> 00:20:16,899 Yep, after a 20-year reign of terror, 577 00:20:16,923 --> 00:20:19,735 we finally got our neighborhood back. 578 00:20:19,759 --> 00:20:21,570 A bunch of Glossners got locked up in juvie, 579 00:20:21,594 --> 00:20:25,241 and the truant officer made two of 'em go back to school. 580 00:20:25,265 --> 00:20:26,509 And a funny thing happened 581 00:20:26,533 --> 00:20:29,245 once there were less kids in the house. 582 00:20:29,269 --> 00:20:33,582 Rita actually became a little more... human. 583 00:20:33,606 --> 00:20:35,818 ? 584 00:20:35,842 --> 00:20:37,653 Flowers look great, Rita. 585 00:20:37,677 --> 00:20:39,455 Thanks, neighbor. [CHUCKLES] 586 00:20:39,479 --> 00:20:41,857 And I didn't even steal these from a cemetery. 587 00:20:41,881 --> 00:20:44,527 I'll put some in a beer can and bring 'em over later. 588 00:20:44,551 --> 00:20:45,861 [CHUCKLES] 589 00:20:45,885 --> 00:20:49,198 ? 590 00:20:49,222 --> 00:20:51,367 Let's face it... It's the kids' fault. 591 00:20:51,391 --> 00:20:53,769 It's the kids that make you crabby. 592 00:20:53,793 --> 00:20:56,794 Synced and corrected by -robtor- www.addic7ed.com 593 00:20:56,844 --> 00:21:01,394 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0